I've Been Alone All Along
by shehasadestiny
Summary: Song fic set to Evanescene’s “My Immortal”. Boomer and Helo pairing. Mostly set on the Galactica, with a bit of story set on Cylonoccupied Caprica as well. Mostly from Galactica Boomer’s POV


Title: I've Been Alone All Along

Author: shehasadestiny

Rating: K

Tagline: _Though you're still with me, I've been alone all along_

Summary: Song fic set to Evanescene's "My Immortal". Boomer and Helo pairing. Mostly set on the _Galactica,_ with a bit of story set on Cylon-occupied Caprica as well. Mostly from _Galactica_ Boomer's POV

Spoilers: Battlestar Galactica: Miniseries, some first season

_I'm so tired of being here_

_Suppressed by all my childish fears_

_And if you had to leave_

_I wish that you would just leave_

_Cause your presence still lingers here_

_And it won't leave me alone_

Boomer watched Helo sleep, a tired, worn-out expression on his otherwise sleep-relaxed face. She smiled to herself; even if she was a Cylon, and not supposed to be capable of love . . . that was certainly what she was "programmed" to feel about Karl C. Agathon. She wanted to run her hand over his face to smooth the worries away from him. But she couldn't; not without waking him up, and she wanted him to get a good deal of sleep before the other Cylons discovered where they were. A gunshot rang through the woods and she was forced to shake him awake. "Huh?" he muttered sleepily.

"Just come on!" she hissed, grabbing the bag and then helping him to his feet. "We've got to go, and we've got to go _now_!"

_These wounds won't seem to heal_

_This pain is just too real_

_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears_

_And I've held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have, all of me_

Sharon Valerii did not like to cry. She didn't like to _need_ to cry, either. She didn't like crying in general. But since the attacks on the Colony worlds, she'd been doing an awful lot of it. Since . . . she'd had to leave Karl Agathon behind. That decision would always haunt her. For the rest of her life, she'd be bombarded with images of that fateful day when the Cylons attacked the Colonies and she'd left Karl behind in a rescue operation. She had been almost in tears that day, but she'd kept it back to be strong for Boxey, who, if not a replacement for Karl, was certainly a good kid.

_You used to captivate me_

_By your resonating life_

_But now I'm bound by the life you left behind_

_Your face, it haunts, my once pleasant dreams_

_Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me_

"CYLON". The word had been scrawled in yellow . . . yellow _something_ across Sharon's locker mirror. It scared her; she wasn't a Cylon! She hurriedly scrubbed it away and looked around for anyone who might have seen it. _Cylon._ That word would haunt her the rest of the day . . . as would the mistake of leaving Karl behind. She missed him horribly, and she wanted him back. She kept telling herself that she loved Chief Tyrol, but . . . she knew that deep down, she loved Karl more. She always had . . . she'd just been afraid to admit it. A relationship with her ECO was almost as dangerous as the one she'd been carrying on with Chief . . .

_These wounds won't seem to heal_

_This pain is just too real_

_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears_

_And I've held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have, all of me_

_Caprica Boomer fell to the ground with the impact of the shot Helo had fired against her._ Helo could still remember the feel of shooting her, and how good it had felt to know he'd killed a Cylon, but how much it hurt to know she'd killed Sharon. Oh good Lords of Kobol, how he'd miss Sharon. He'd loved her with everything in him; his soul had been hers, and her soul, his.

_I'd love to walk away_

_And pull myself out of the rain_

_But I can't leave without you_

_I'd love to live without you_

_The constant fear and endless doubt_

_But I can't live without you_

Sharon lay on her bunk, staring up at empty nothingness. She missed Karl. She missed him horribly. She hadn't seen Chief all day, in favor of sulking over missing Karl. She didn't feel well, and she missed being with him . . . her new ECO, Crashdown . . . well, he didn't quite measure up to the standards Karl had put down before he'd been left behind. He was a great kid, but he wasn't a match for Karl. Karl, the greatest ECO in the world. Karl, the best friend in the world. Karl, who'd always had her back. Karl, who'd said, "Look at those clouds, Sharon. Just look at them, and tell me this isn't the end of everything . . ."

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears_

_And I've held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have, all of me_

Sharon stared at the empty seat. She'd hidden in the Raptor to escape the constant noise and bustle of the rest of the massive battlestar. She wished she could go back for Karl, but there wasn't anything she could do. Nothing, whatsoever. The thought made her sick, and she wanted to go throw up. Wanted to get away from the _Galactica_, and go back to . . . Was she even sure he was still alive? With a sigh, she admitted that she wasn't even sure that her ex-ECO was still alive at all. _Maybe, just maybe . . . You never know, Karl always did have a stubborn survivalist streak . . ._


End file.
